So here I am Lord for the 15th night it
seems. For the last few weeks I have not been able to sleep. You know how hard
it is to wake up in the middle of the night every day and not be able to sleep
again. WHAT are you telling me or doing? Agravation? Well its working! Im so
tired of being tired and not getting sleep. I woke up at 2 am today and have
not been able to sleep since. WHY NOT! Do I have a lot on my mind? YES and you
know that. Job, Money, life plan, relationships,
past, and even thoughts I shouldn’t have. Now I know you have a sense of humor
but this is not funny! Lord here I am, I am not sure what you want to speak to
me about but I am all ears. Please stop the bleeding!
In the stillness of the night, my ears turn to you,
My heart beats with fear, what do I do.
My life laid down, wait is it really yours?
Do I do it out of calling, or is it like a chore?
God right now without you I am lost
You gave us your son, never doubting the cost
Yet I cry and weep for what I don’t have
A life without you is empty and sad.
Turn your ear to me O LORD,
Im hear and im waiting, this moment is yours
Give me the words to write and convey,
A message to the lost, in your very own way.
My God and King, I lift my arms to the sky,
I bow at your feet, sometimes empty inside
I know its wrong, to complain and ask
For you to take the hurt, and redeem me of my past
My life is different, why, im not sure,
To write your words on paper, maybe a cure,
For the broken hearted who need to hear,
The truth of your promise, each day of the year,
You died for them and you died for me,
Then life swoops in and I can no longer see
The storms that cloud my visions and heart
Yet your always there, and we are far apart
Patiently waiting on me from above,
Your tears that fall, your unfailing love
No matter what, no matter where,
Nothing I do will ever compare,
To the life you gave, in your precious son
Remind me Father, of what you have done.
Giving us freedom, from past to present
We still second guess, and are filled with tension
The circumstances to hard, the pain is too much
I cry and I beg, and you tell me to hush
What can I say, Lord im easily brokem,
Help me remember your blessings and tokens
Those of hope, and joy and peace
Through the chaos, you never fail to reach.
You stretch out your arms, and pick me up,
When I am completely empty and no water in my cup,
I came to you, that night in the cold,
I said words of truth, my foundations showed
I fell to my knees, asking Why God Why
Out of the tears and pain, I let out a sigh
Only to know, its all up to you
The grace, the burdens, the promise is true,
You were there then, you’re here with me now,
How can I question, and continue to doubt.
My lord give me strength in my time of need,
Speak to my heart, do not let it bleed
From the cuts and bruises from the life I lived
Stop the bleeding now, no more to give,
It hurts to go back, to my faults and my troubles
The mistakes I carry now, the hurt is now doubled
Sticks and stones continue to be thrown,
I stand firm in your presence,, to let the truth be
known
Just a little more, I know your worn out,
Close your and breathe, stop beginning to doubt.
A song is coming, im working in your heart
To give you the words, Ill tell you when to start.
Be patient remember, your choices your life
Mistakes will happen, you will be alright
I love you chris, push forward don’t run
My plans for you are many, Im not close to being
done.
Ok God, I woke up and I heard you speak to me. As I
pray now before I go back to sleep, or try to, I ask that you forgive me for
being stupid and my areas of sin. It breaks our relationship and trust me I
feel it every time. Help me be the man you have designed. Not of this world but
of you! My Lord heal my heart. Open the doors that you wish me to walk and
close the doors you do not want open anymore. Give me the strength to stand
firm, when trials come my way, open my heart to hear what you have to say.
God I pray as I close my eyes,
your
refreshing spirit comes over my life.
The sinuses,
the soreness, the pains, the tears,
I pray that
you heal me and guide my years.
The past I lay down, for the future ahead,
Giving up now, well I know id be dead.
Redeem, restore, refocus and refresh
My life, my past, my unplanned mess.
