Time to Listen

Here I am Lord, you have something to say

You have waited a while, but today is the day,

Can you let me in, to the plans you made

For me to glorify your precious name

My heart has been thinking, of something to write

Yet I never gave you time, please God give me sight

First forgive me, I just have been waiting

Like setting up the mood, for just the right placement

God I know, your always around,

I hear your words and don’t make a sound

I put it off, yet I am dying to know,

What can it be, what will you show.

I close my eyes to begin to write

Nervous a little, not sure why

Speak truth to me, I open the door

Fill me Father, like waves on the shore.

My son, my friend, why have you ran

Is it not true, you’re afraid of my plan

Let me shine, be bold and brave,

It’s me that does the work, remember I save

Just slow down and make sure you’re near

To my words of truth I’ve spoken so clear,

My dear son I know you’re nervous

You have avoided my words, deliberate and on purpose.

Well Chris its time, to hear

Thank you for drawing and coming so near

The last few weeks I’ve watched you my child

I’ve seen you teach, and grow, and smile

It’s real as can be, your gift I’ve given,

To lead, the ones who don’t always listen

Encouragement came, and you accepted my grace

Do not doubt Me or your place,

Your calling is real and I can see the change

Of those lives you touched and rearranged

That day I saw you, shaken and scared

Laying on your bed, tears because you cared

I moved in you to act not just sit

You took on the guilt, and sought forgiveness in it

That night I did some things and truth was spoken

Your heart awakened, changed, your life a token

A piece of my plan, a purpose to live out

You’ve taken on the calling, to live and not doubt

You have taken the steps, to lead and grow,

I know your sick now, but in it, who knows what I’ll show

It could be faith, it could be care,

Maybe rest and love, nothing can compare,

To sit with me, right here and now,

As I speak to you, about the life you live out

Yes you have been wrong, and hurt those you know

Yet my truth still engraved in your heart, it shows

You know my ways and over the last few weeks

I have seen you grow, mature, and think

The hurt you have caused, will someday fade,

Stay true to my word, and know me by name

I have shown you in time, that prayers are heard

I just takes you, to believe and read my words

Through the psalms of my child David, and the life of the wise

Truth cannot be hidden, nor can any lies

Stand firm on the rock when things start to move

The stability of me, is sometimes never used

You run Chris, you collapse in fear

Just look at what I have done in just this year.

A friend to love, and freedom from shame,

You know I redeem, by the power of my name,

Don’t fret or worry, I have fought for you,

Bought with a price, my promise so true.

Continue to live out, the faith of me

Overtime keep trusting, so they can see

My light and my power, the things I can do,

Remember the past, yes I saved even you.

My child don’t wait, when I tell you to slow down

I don’t want you to miss, the importance of now.

Your busy, yes, and I love your heart,

After all I knew it, from the start.

The waves of mercy and the waves of grace,

Who knows what will happen, just continue to pray

Im true to my word, hold fast to me,

Look at your past, and just believe.

Wait one second, just one more moment,

I cannot leave you before this is spoken

Search and know, fast and pray,

For the joy that I bring, each and every day,

Hold fast to my words, my truth so clear

Reflect on what ive done, in just one year.

See my son, I have waited for time

To share my thoughts, and speak to your mind,

Be lifted up, today shine bright

As time goes on, carry out my light,

Don’t wait so long, don’t ever be afraid

If I say something again, its because ive called you by name

Stand firm, hold tight, my promise is true

My glory will shine, in everything you do.

Late night encounter

So here I am Lord for the 15^th night it seems. For the last few weeks I have not been able to sleep. You know how hard it is to wake up in the middle of the night every day and not be able to sleep again. WHAT are you telling me or doing? Agravation? Well its working! Im so tired of being tired and not getting sleep. I woke up at 2 am today and have not been able to sleep since. WHY NOT! Do I have a lot on my mind? YES and you know that.  Job, Money, life plan, relationships, past, and even thoughts I shouldn’t have. Now I know you have a sense of humor but this is not funny! Lord here I am, I am not sure what you want to speak to me about but I am all ears. Please stop the bleeding!

In the stillness of the night, my ears turn to you,

My heart beats with fear, what do I do.

My life laid down, wait is it really yours?

Do I do it out of calling, or is it like a chore?

God right now without you I am lost

You gave us your son, never doubting the cost

Yet I cry and weep for what I don’t have

A life without you is empty and sad.

Turn your ear to me O LORD,

Im hear and im waiting, this moment is yours

Give me the words to write and convey,

A message to the lost, in your very own way.

My God and King, I lift my arms to the sky,

I bow at your feet, sometimes empty inside

I know its wrong, to complain and ask

For you to take the hurt, and redeem me of my past

My life is different, why, im not sure,

To write your words on paper, maybe a cure,

For the broken hearted who need to hear,

The truth of your promise, each day of the year,

You died for them and you died for me,

Then life swoops in and I can no longer see

The storms that cloud my visions and heart

Yet your always there, and we are far apart

Patiently waiting on me from above,

Your tears that fall, your unfailing love

No matter what, no matter where,

Nothing I do will ever compare,

To the life you gave, in your precious son

Remind me Father, of what you have done.

Giving us freedom, from past to present

We still second guess, and are filled with tension

The circumstances to hard, the pain is too much

I cry and I beg, and you tell me to hush

What can I say, Lord im easily brokem,

Help me remember your blessings and tokens

Those of hope, and joy and peace

Through the chaos, you never fail to reach.

You stretch out your arms, and pick me up,

When I am completely empty and no water in my cup,

I came to you, that night in the cold,

I said words of truth, my foundations showed

I fell to my knees, asking Why God Why

Out of the tears and pain, I let out a sigh

Only to know, its all up to you

The grace, the burdens, the promise is true,

You were there then, you’re here with me now,

How can I question, and continue to doubt.

My lord give me strength in my time of need,

Speak to my heart, do not let it bleed

From the cuts and bruises from the life I lived

Stop the bleeding now, no more to give,

It hurts to go back, to my faults and my troubles

The mistakes I carry now, the hurt is now doubled

Sticks and stones continue to be thrown,

I stand firm in your presence,, to let the truth be known

Just a little more, I know your worn out,

Close your and breathe, stop beginning to doubt.

A song is coming, im working in your heart

To give you the words, Ill tell you when to start.

Be patient remember, your choices your life

Mistakes will happen, you will be alright

I love you chris, push forward don’t run

My plans for you are many, Im not close to being done.

Ok God, I woke up and I heard you speak to me. As I pray now before I go back to sleep, or try to, I ask that you forgive me for being stupid and my areas of sin. It breaks our relationship and trust me I feel it every time. Help me be the man you have designed. Not of this world but of you! My Lord heal my heart. Open the doors that you wish me to walk and close the doors you do not want open anymore. Give me the strength to stand firm, when trials come my way, open my heart to hear what you have to say.

God I pray as I close my eyes,

 your refreshing spirit comes over my life.

 The sinuses, the soreness, the pains, the tears,

 I pray that you heal me and guide my years.

The past I lay down, for the future ahead,

Giving up now, well I know id be dead.

Redeem, restore, refocus and refresh

My life, my past, my unplanned mess.

Endurance and Hope

Brothers and sisters, I want to encourage you today above anything else.
"For whatever was written in former days was written for our instruction, that through endurance and through the encouragement of the Scriptures we might have hope." Romans 15:4

Life is full of hardships. You my friends I know have endured a great deal of pain and sadness throughout your life. Including myself, I have been through many family battles, fights with friends, school, and many other things that truly break us down. Life is not said to be a fun ride to the top is it? If so, I have lost the memo. As Paul writes to us in how our instructions to endure hard times and hold on to the hope that God gives us through is word, we can only look back and be thankful for that road we have been on. For those of you who currently dealing with issues of stress, work, relationships, or maybe just nothing is going right, My prayer to you is that you not only find peace in my words, but the truth of Hope and encouragement can be found in something far greater that what i can ever write. My your day be brightened to not only to spread encouragement to others, but to go embrace the Hope, our King has given us!

Today

So on Saturday i was able to set aside my morning to spend it with the Lord and let me tell you did he show up!

I reflected on the week and the trials i encountered from Monday to Friday and really soaked it all in. For me, in order to lay the things down i need to, i have to recount them and truly desire to uncover a accurate depiction of it all. When I was asked how my week was going, conversations such as, "I'm overwhelmed because..., or It has been a rough week..., or is it Friday yet?" All those, which i regret are all negative, actually happened. Though they were honest personal challenges and feelings, life giving they were not. Reflecting on this and sitting in the presence of the God truly is hard, yet is comforting at the same time.

For those who have experienced this feeling understand where i am coming from, for those who haven't, just wait, be patience and you will. There is nothing more rewarding than to reflect and sit before the Lord. His surpassing peace really touched my heart, and even though my week had been rough, it was as if, the trials i faced made me value my escape with Jesus that morning. There i was, sitting in the living room, God and I connecting. PRICELESS!!

The times i spend with God are some of my most precious moments. They stretch beyond the surreal church service, and prayers in the car, to an intimate relationship with someone who loves me more than anything in the world. His arms stretched out, I cry to him and await his response. Tears fall from my eyes as i realize that the week is behind me and i can embrace my struggles, and move on. My accounts of that morning are simply unexplainable. Many times have I sat in the presence of the Lord and been lashing out at him, complaining, judging, doubting, and neglecting every GOOD thing he has done for me.

That morning, all the things culminated into a few key things i needed to work on. Only a short time with God brought out so much in my life as i sought for HIS best. The biggest thing i can thank him for was reminding me of my need for his strength, not my own. The busyness of life had engulfed my fire and passion to lay it all down for HIM and shut me down in all areas. Many things were placed on my shoulders this pass week and i forgot to carry God's yoke and give him mine. But what had this done to me? Why did i just now realize it all?

There is only one way that i fail to see the Big Picture during the week and that is to spend time with him and constantly fight for his presence. From the early morning hours to the evening when the day comes to an end we are called to, pray continually, and meditate on the word day and night. Life, the world, and exhaustion pushed me over the thoughts of spending time with God and hashing things out with him in the moment.

Nothing can be said about tough weeks or times except, PRAISE GOD THAT IT IS OVER, but yet knowing that more will come. It is inevitable we will go through life with trials and sufferings of many kinds. Hard days at work, conflicts between peers and other worldly pressures that are meaningless will set out to destroy your attitude and joy.

When is the last time you looked back at anything to see your faults and struggles, embrace what it is, and step forward for the greater good of the Kingdom of God?

WASHED

To all of us who gave the commitment at church to be baptized, October 24th, 2010. May the day and these words just be a reminder of where we came from, where we stand now, and everything God has done in between. May we stand in awe of that day, excited and empowered to glorify God in all that we do.

For those of you do not know how I write, I really feel that God writes through me... Take the words as if they were yours and hold on to the moments and flow in the spirit as I trust that It WILL speak to you. We are family now and i am so blessed to have been able to share that day and this with you all.

We looked up, to the sky one day

,Said Lord i need you, take my past away.

Giving us peace, strength and love,

Your presence felt, came straight from above.

Our friend then, forever in our minds,

Yet we sometimes fall, forgetting the times,

The times you turned our lives around

Whether floating in air, or walking on the ground.

Your comfort, your peace, your truth, your light,

Not growing weary, neither morning or night.

For god to change my life forever,

gives me confidence to stand tall, in all sorts of weather

The storms come and our lives crash like waves

We submit our troubles Lord their yours to take.

Standing in grace, abounding in love,

we stand in awe, and we rise above

We look to the sky, we remember that day,

when we gave our lives, our sins washed away.

For some it meant weeks, for others it meant years.

A life now to God, brings out the tears.

Tears of joy, excitement, and desire.

Life no longer walking a wire.

His arms spread, from east to west.

Our life, His hands, that grueling death.

To look back and think, the pain the hurt,

Washed by the blood, he counts my worth.

Worthy of Him, called for a reason...

Its now time to shine, so matter which season.

We followed the words, Seek, Ask and Knock,

Our life sealed forever, heavens a lock.

Remember that moment, the feeling, the tears,

The joy we will live, for the rest of our years.

What to do next, why not make a statement,

Baptized by water, no way to fake it.

We took a deep breath and down we went,

Washed by the water, we knew what it meant.

To follow our king, it is all worth it,

symbolic or obedient, we stood with a purpose.

That day a declaration, in front of a crowd,

There Our savior stood, smiling and proud.

We followed him, washed as he was,

Sealed from above, and called out in Love.

Reassurance

Sitting here talking to him,
Praising God I am forgiven,

Along time coming, my desires come first,
Living in sin, nothing seems worse.

My mind clear, your presence near
My heart, my thoughts, my doubts, my fears

Given hope, redeemed by grace
What I wouldn't give, to see his face

Shattered and torn, at times falling fast,
Caught in a feeling, a moment, the past.

Easily side tracked, pushed around
The weight too heavy I fall to the ground

To my knees I fall, calling your name
Your mercy and love, no longer ashamed

Created by Him, His hands, His love
Saved by Grace, called from above.

Close your eyes, my Son, breathe,
look to the sky, I am all you need.

You work, you plead, you cry to me
I love you child, can't you see

Relax, be free, set your mind above,
I’m with you there, don't doubt my love.

Patience my friend, remember, in my time
You don't need a moment, a word, or sign.

Carried you and tested your heart.
Growing in the moments, we seemed far apart

Push through the doubt; rise above
My son stay strong, Be patient in love.

.... In the Moment

Its been some time since my last piece and i pray that this is timely to all who read it! Whether now or ten years for now I pray that the words from God echo in your heart and speak to you in some way.
____________________________________________________________________

My God, My king, My Father, My friend.
We sit here and shout, the hurt wont mend.

We run the race, we come in last,
It’s not about winning, God just laughs.

He has called you, he has called me
Follow the light, walk to eternity.

Give up, give in, run, and be scared?
Your love never ending, the pain is still there.

Father I am calling, I want you here,
The doubts, the lies, my thoughts, my fears.

That person, the hurt, from just the other day,
Clouded by darkness, Lord please take it away.

I cry to you now, like every night before,
My path not perfect, yet you are my core.

I know who you are, I want your touch
Empty me please, your love means so much

I can’t move on, I can’t get passed it,
I’m stuck in a box, I feel so crowded

Nothing works, my hope is gone,
Lord hear my cry, “What have I Done Wrong?”

Songs play, my heart opens wide,
Come to me father, tears fall from my eyes.

To walk in your path, not stagger my own,
I know I screw up as these pages have formed.

My broken soul, reaching for your hands,
Setting myself apart, forever I’ll stand.

Lord I stand, your grace surrounds,
Forgive me, forgive them, and break the bounds.

You set me free, you called MY name,
In your light today, I have no shame.

Forgiven and send out, disciple of you,
Your word, your touch, your grace so true.

All I want to do, is feel you Lord,
My day, my night, my life now yours.